Capitals’ defenseman Karl Alzner’s dogs had way more fun Wednesday night than he did (PHOTO)
Imagine being Washington Capitals’ defenseman Karl Alzner Wednesday night. Imagine, say, that you played 37:14, over 11 minutes more than your previous career-high, in a 2-1 triple-overtime loss to the New York Rangers — that you were one of the players in a game that beat pretty much everyone to a bloody pulp and took 114:41 to decide, nearly twice as long as it was supposed to.
Worse, imagine that, just after you pressured Dan Girardi along the far boards, he swung the puck behind the goal to Brad Richards, who centered to Marian Gaborik for the game-winner at 14:41, and all you could do was slam your stick against the glass and head to the room as they celebrated.
Then imagine that, six hours after puck drop, you arrived at home, sore as all hell, thinking about all the things that could have gone your way but didn’t. And then you opened your door to this nonsense:
Aw Hell no
Alzner tweeted the following photo at 1:57 a.m. EST Thursday morning, captioned with the words, “Dogs not happy about the loss either.”
Seriously, if I’m Alzner and this is what’s waiting for me after that brutal night, one of those dogs is getting punted through the window. Maybe the big one.
This is why I prefer cats. Sure, they aren’t eagerly meeting you at the front door making you feel wanted and loved — they could hardly care where you go or what you do as long as you clean their poop — but they’re also not wrecking up the place just because you’re three hours late.
This is like one of those “I Spy” photos. A cursory examination yields bits of newspaper, bits of magazine, bits of red plastic bag, slippers, a couch cushion, and two dogs confident that they had the best damn night of their lives.